Commitment is probably one of the most important values important in a relationship – regardless if a couple is going steady, married, or in a closed relationship. This notation of commitment isn’t just relevant to the status of the relationship, but to the actual contract of the partnership. Are you committed for life? Whatever your situation, mental toughness and love do really intercept.

Read on to see if you are really committed and get the secret of mental toughness to add to the strength of your relationship.

Commitment can imply loyalty, security, and a desire to keep the relationship going. Commitment in a relationship can also point to the extent to which partners keep up with their part of the bargain. Relationships are not just about an initial commitment to stay married. For relationships to be successful and healthy, partners are required to keep up their commitment to do the little things which make their relationship flourish. This is a great place to examine the intersect between love and mental toughness.

To measure one’s mental toughness, the MTQ48  gives athletes a realistic assessment of their individual mental toughness. This well-regarded and reliable tool was developed to understand why some people handle stress, challenges, and pressure better than others.

The test set out to see if they could measure strengths and weakness in regard to matters related to mental toughness. In 2002, Professor Peter Clough and Dr Keith Earle built on the decades of work already completed by developing this questionnaire, which resulted in determining core themes relevant to the posed questions.

Their work added “commitment” and “challenge” components to mental toughness. This seemed to explain reasons why some were able to rebound from failure and cope with stress better than others.  Now backed by 100 independent research papers, the 4Cs of mental toughness has become the model to assess mental toughness.

The commitment scale of mental toughness measures how individuals set goals and targets. An individual who scores at the high end of the scale will be able to handle and achieve things even in difficult situations. They will find ways to motivate themselves and often have an internal voice which allows them to sustain effort despite the environment.

An individual with a low level of commitment will find it difficult to complete tasks when facing significant tasks. They may not believe that they can overcome obstacles and find it hard to summon enthusiasm for work. They may shut down and have excuses for why things don’t happen.

It doesn’t seem hard to make the connection between the health of “commitment” in a relationship and the level of mental toughness a partner has. Those that are mentally tougher will still keep their relationship commitment. Whether that is doing kind things or showing appreciation, they will do this based on their obligation, not based on the results. A person with higher mental toughness will motivate themselves intrinsically because they think it is the right thing to do.

Partners with mental sensitivity will blame their partner for their lack of commitment. They will make the relationship deposits only when it’s easy. Their enthusiasm will likely wax and wane and they may be pessimistic to shield themselves from disappointment.

So, what should you do if you find yourself reading this and realizing that you may be more mentally sensitive in this category? Should you just depend on your mentally tough partner? That is one strategy, but one that makes you dependent and powerless.

But if you are reading this thinking that you would like to develop more mental toughness in the category of “commitment,” than you might investigate some of these interventions that have research to suggest that they can make a difference practiced.
  • Positive thinking
    • Positive thinking can include SWOT analysis, the 5 Whys, or mind mapping.
    • Remind yourself of the reasons that make you want to take action (gratitude lists about the partner can help).
  • Attentional control
    • Break down big asks into manageable tasks which you can complete.
    • Make daily actions a habit to help you maintain focus.
  • Goal setting
    • Pick one thing to do consistently.
    • Make a SMART goal.
  • Visualization
    • Imagine yourself doing the actions and see the benefits for your relationship.
    • Create an internal voice which motivates you to be your best self.
  • Anxiety control
    • Breathe.
    • Guided meditations.
  • Dealing with Procrastination
    • Do something – anything.
    • Do it right away, when you first think about it.

If you are interested in knowing your strengths and sensitives take the  MTQ48 Mental Toughness Assessment test and feedback session.

Along with this assessment you will receive:
Your overall Mental Toughness levels
The Four Cs (control, commitment, challenge, & confidence), and
The Subscale Scores for Control and Confidence.


The MTQ48 Mental Toughness Assessment contains a unique 48 item high-quality psychometric test that measures components of Mental Toughness, describing the mindset that every person adopts in everything they do. The most common qualities associated with Mental Toughness are character, resilience, and grit, among others.


Do you struggle with commitment in your relationship? Do you have the secret of mental toughness that brings strength and success to your relationship?  You may also be interested in reaching an effective lasting solution through an intensive couples bootcamp that is designed to take you through several months of therapy in 2-3 days.
Visit Emergent Relationship Center and schedule today to book your free consultation call.